Cussing Kids? From the Mouths of Babes (cont'd)

Watching closely to make sure Kita didn’t take a playful snip at baby girl’s legs, I leaned back against the wooden park bench relieved. No, Kita did not intend, at least for the moment, to tug at my daughter. I could finally delve into the mystery novel I attempted to complete for the past two weeks.

I could hear hubby and his leaf blower fussing around in the front yard between the garage and backyard; and I could also hear my seven year old son questioning his dad over the buzzing noise about riding his bike.

I didn’t care about the response to my son’s question to hubby, because after all, son was with dad, daughter was with mom and dog, and mom was about to dive into the storyline.

My guess was right. Son was not pleased with dad’s answer as son walked through the back door attached to the garage with a scowl etched on his otherwise cute face. Son was walking with a serious pout, determined to find some other activity second to bike riding down to the cul-de-sac.

I shrugged and smiled at son, he mirrored back a smile only phonier. I glanced downward to my lap where I found the place I left off weeks ago. “The perpetrator stood by watching, calculating his prey’s next move like a lioness hunting deer...�

Clank. The latch to the back gate unfastened. My thoughtful four year old decided it would be very responsible to toss the granola bar wrapper into the City of Charlotte issued trash bin, which was on the other side of the gate.

Kita, the keen breed that she is, sprang up ready to leap at the opportunity to escape from the backyard. The scene was happening fast. How quickly could I get to the gate to close it before my hyper German Shepherd darted through the picket fence gate and across the street to harass the neighbor’s yapping-all-the-time Chihuahua? I stood up and called out, “daughter…�

My sentence was choked off by a sharp, pitched yell, “Sister, close the D%^&$ gate!�

My mouth dropped open and I gasped or maybe it was the other way around. Either way, I was mortified. Did my seven year old just say what I thought he said? Right then, hubby developed bionic ears, ‘cause Lord knows when I say things to him most times and even in his ear directly, he don’t hear me. But this sunny, humid-free day, through leaf blower and all, hubby managed to catch wind of our son dishing out an order garnished in the “D� cuss word to four year old daughter.

Hubby was not a happy landscaper, I mean camper and he surely let pseudo, Sergeant Seven Year Old know it in a way to prevent aforementioned event from happening again. Then, hubby looked at me and with pointed finger warned, “Mother of offsprings, which would be me, Moni) stop cursing!�

And that is when I realized—when it hit me to the core that my seven year old loving, jovial, singing all the time, son got in trouble with dad because of me and my mouth. I never felt so low, irresponsible, and ashamed; especially when Sorrowful Seven Year Old said with tears rolling down his eyes and finger pointed at me, “I got in trouble because of you, because you say that word.�

Hugging my son, I apologized to him and reassured him that indeed it was my fault that he got in trouble and that I would do everything I could not to disappoint him again (in terms of cussing). I also apologized to hubby as he later told me he felt bad chastising son as it was a lose/lose situation.

Yes, I am a responsible mom and I strive to teach my children to: make good choices, recognize the difference between right and wrong, be respectfully, remember to say please, thank you, yes and be honest. And yes, this incident forced me to wrestle with and win the battle against my arch-nemesis, the “occasional� cuss words.

All is forgiven, a lesson was learned and life has moved forward. Isn’t that how it should be after a major family situation?

However, sometimes, we have to take a moment to really reflect and be honest with ourselves. As parents, when our children do things or say things that are shockingly unacceptable, we may tend to blame the school, daycare, neighbors or environment for exposing our children to unbelievable behavior or verbiage. When in fact, it would be good to do a self examination check first and own, accept and work to change what we know is the true contributing factor.

Our ‘bad sons and daughters; we want and will strive to do and be wiser parents.

Monique Scott is a Consultant for SimplyFun. She’s been asked by the company to open up Charlotte, NC and other states by promoting the importance of face-to-face play. To join and support Monique with this mission and to learn more about adding quality, fun time with loved ones, visit: www.just.simplyfun.com